


Drunken Rambles at 4 AM

by AyJay_Blue



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Drunk Shiro, Keith takes Shiro way too seriously, Keith's Practical Jokes aren't nice, Lance and Matt are meme bros, M/M, Matt is a good boyfie, broganes, shiro is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-24
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-04-27 04:56:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14418147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AyJay_Blue/pseuds/AyJay_Blue
Summary: When Shiro calls Matt out at 4 AM, Matt didn't expect the problem to be THIS bad. Somehow, he wasn't surprised to find out that Keith is involved.----or, basically me word-vomiting the prompt idea my beloved gave me ;)





	Drunken Rambles at 4 AM

**Author's Note:**

  * For [keithy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/keithy/gifts).



> For the insane piece of shit I have come to love and know as my best friend, this is for you. XD This is something I did class because... >_> Well I wasn't listening. But hey! I hope this makes you smile. ♥
> 
> I promise to clean up the word-vomit. 
> 
> Enjoy~

There was very little that bothered Shiro. All of them, however, had something to do with Keith.

 

And that was how he, a fully-functioning, grown man at the age of twenty-four was seated at the corner of a dingy bar at three am on a Wednesday with his boyfriend tiredly patting his back as he stopped the man from downing his sixth glass of Sazerac. (Matt was counting the number since he arrived and honestly, he wasn’t sure how much Shiro had consumed before he arrived. Judging by the bartender’s concerned look, probably a lot.) Matt was surprised Shiro was still standing, and looking somewhat sober, considering how much alcohol he had consumed. The older man sighed, tiredly rubbing his prosthetic hand through his hair.

 

“Sorry for calling you here at this time of the night, Matt.” Shiro mumbled after a while, hand rubbing at his forehead as Matt pressed his lips together in a small smile.

 

“It’s fine.” He paused, watching Shiro eye him at the corner of his eyes. Matt shrugged. “Katie was asking me and Hunk to help with Rover anyway.” He said, referring to the drone that his sister had been working on.

 

Shiro nodded, and was about to ask for another glass before reeling back, tugging on what little amount of common sense he still had left. Taking that as his cue to start the interrogation, Matt sided closer to him.

 

“So, what happened?” Shiro sighed at the question.

 

“I think Keith has a boyfriend.”

 

Matt refrained from snickering. Instead he gave Shiro another pat on the back and motioned for him to continue talking. The man sighed softly and the younger ordered a tall glass of water. That should help with the hangover his boyfriend would be sporting.

 

“What made you think so?”

 

Shiro let out a sound that was similar to a wounded whine. Matt quietly thanked the bartender and handed Shiro the drink.

 

“Last week, when Lance came over, he and Keith scampered down to the basement to work on their homework.” His hands tightened slightly over the cool glass as he pressed it against his forehead. “That was around eleven in the afternoon. They came out around dinner, and Keith absolutely reeked of Lance.” He scowled, downing the drink in one gulp while Matt continued to hide his grin.

 

“Oh… you didn’t check on them? During the day?” He asked, watching Shiro give him a weak look.

 

“I wanted to, but—“ Shiro blushed, and Matt couldn’t contain his snickers anymore. The older shot him a dark look and Matt grinned.

 

“Yeah, and? You didn’t invade their privacy, what happened next?”

 

Shiro looked away. “I confronted them after, and you know what Keith said?” He straightened, before hunching a little, face shifting into Keith’s unamused expression.

 

Matt swore it took a long time for the alcohol to take effect. He bit back a laugh as Shiro copied his brother.

 

“’ _We’re just friends, Shiro. It just so happened that we were watching_ Fifty Shades of Gray _. Nothing happened.’_ ” He said, in a low, brooding huff that was definitely Keith. Matt laughed loudly, patting Shiro on the back.

 

“Maybe they _were_ just watching. It’s not right to assume, you know.” He said cheekily. Shiro gave him a blank stare.

 

“Matt,” He began, in that _Dad Voice_ that reminded him so much of his own father when he and Pidge deserved a scolding. “I’m pretty sure Anastasia Steele’s love interest isn’t named _Lance_.” He quipped and the brunette let out another loud bark of laughter, clutching his stomach as Shiro gave him a wounded stare.

 

“Alright, alright. But maybe it’s a one-time thing?” He suggested when his laughter subsided.

 

Shiro shook his head, and Matt took the initiative to order another tall glass of water. No more alcohol tonight it seemed. Besides, that would help lessen the hangover.

 

“Every squad night, Keith always wears Lance’s clothes the next morning.” He said, grunting as another glass of water was pushed into his hand. Matt shrugged.

 

“They’re the same size?”

 

Shiro gave him another look. “Everyone stays over in Keith’s room.”

 

“Ah… What else?”

 

The older man downed his water again, licking his lips as he continued to list out his evidence. Matt thanks his lucky stars he was free tomorrow. Plus, it wasn’t every day he was dragged out of the house by his stunning boyfriend, even if it was to whine about how trouble he was with his little brother’s love life. At this rate, Shiro was gonna get gray hairs.

 

He eyed the white fringe.

 

Scratch that, Shiro already had gray hair.

 

“Keith got mad at me the other day when I was collecting his laundry.” There was a sad whine at the back of his throat. “I asked him why he had Lance’s varsity jacket and he told me not to touch it. He _growled_ at me, Matt. I just wanted to clean it!”

 

Matt held his laughter in and continued to pat his boyfriend reassuringly. Yes, Shiro was slightly drunk.

 

“And you know those multicolored hair ties Lance keeps on hand for his siblings? I saw Keith using them last week.” He finished off what was left of his water and Matt obligingly ordered another glass.

 

“That reminds me, Katie told me that she found a half-empty box of condoms in the glove compartment of Lance’s SUV.” He said, watching as Shiro let out another strangled sound of discomfort. “….. would it be bad if I added that—“

 

“Yes.”

 

They fell into silence once more. It was painstakingly obvious that the two were together. He wasn’t really sure what was bothering Shiro though. Everyone knew. He was about to voice his opinion when his boyfriend opened his mouth again.

 

“Then, they keep driving each other to and from school in an alternating pattern. Constantly. Once, I had to let Lance in at three in the morning just so he could snuggle with Keith after a bad night.” The older man groused, and Matt felt himself smile.

 

“What I don’t get is why he’s not telling me anything.”

 

‘ _Ah… So that’s what bothered him._ ’ Matt thought, watching Shiro slump against him slightly, much like a big, tired cat looking for a few headpats. The strong, independent Shiro, at lost because his little brother wouldn’t admit to having a boyfriend. Matt felt a little bad at that.

 

“Maybe he doesn’t trust me enough? Is he scared of telling me?” Shiro whispered under his breath and Matt felt his heart constrict. Matt sighs softly and leans in to give Shiro a hug. He reminded himself to question Keith himself some other time.

 

“Come on, it’s almost four. You have work tomorrow.” Matt said after a while, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek as he hauled the man to his feet. He made sure to send Pidge a message or two to tell her that he wasn’t gonna go home anytime soon.

 

He had a slightly hungover boyfriend to take care of.

 

 

**OWARI**

[EXTRA]

 

Lance hummed softly as Keith nuzzled into his chest, eyes scanning the ceiling as he tugged at Keith’s mullet. “You know, I never took you as someone who took practical jokes too far, Mullet.” He mused, watching as Keith blearily blinked up at him before letting out a huff.

 

“He’s the one who told me not to tell him I had a boyfriend. His fault.” Keith groused, tugging his boyfriend closer to him. Lance snorted, eyes flicking over to his phone when it lit up. Shifting so he could accommodate both cuddling his boyfriend and reaching for his phone, he snickered at the message.

Keith snorted slightly, ducking his head under his laughing boyfriend’s chin. “Later.” He said, nudging Lance to return the phone and resume their little snuggle fest. Telling Shiro could wait later. After a while, Lance let out a soft grunt.

 

“Shiro really told you that?”

 

“Yup.”

 

“….. You do know that he was probably joking, right?”

 

Keith smirked and snuggled back, closing his eyes and refusing to respond.

 

Later that day, he told a very hungover Shiro, who seemed to be on the verge of crying when he realized that no, Keith did not _not_ trust him and that it was just a practical joke.

 


End file.
